Today’s post that you’re about to dive into is a guest post from an incredible and inspiring woman who I admire for being vocal and vulnerable about a subject so many of us can relate to. Being enough in a not enough world. No matter who you are or what kind of life you have, it’s easy to get lost in the social-media-obsessed world we live in today. We’ve all had moments of defeat and times when we question our self-worth. I’ve been there. I hope this new series on my blog will help lift spirits and bring you a fresh new perspective from real and inspiring women. Please let me know at the end of this post what you think of these guest contributed posts in 2018 here on my blog. xo, Saz
The other day I did something that led me down an ugly path: I found myself perusing the social media channels of a young woman doing what I am passionate about in life, but much further down the road. Some might say she is more successful. I found myself comparing what I was doing with what she was doing and a bit of jealousy began to grip my heart. Not only was she flourishing in her dream, but she was beautiful and seemed to have this vibrant life that made my days filled with baby spit-up, exhaustion, and rare one-on-one hubby time seem mundane. I began to discount my worth.
Comparison is a horrible thing and social media doesn’t help. For the record, I happen to adore following my friends on Instagram and keeping up with my family on Facebook. It can be a wonderful thing. However, it also beckons you and me to secret places of feeling bad about who we are and what we are doing in life.
• You see a fashion blogger looking perfect as usual and feel a little less pretty.
• A like-minded girl gets recognized for her passion and you go unnoticed.
• Her husband seems to always be doting on her and you feel lonely.
• She got the perfect family picture but your kid(s) has been in the worst mood all day and you’re barely keeping it together.
Truth is, people often portray what they want people to believe about them. Rarely does the follower get a real glimpse into that person’s life. Rarely do they see the imperfect and unlovely. Television and magazines don’t always help either. Starting with this in mind, know that no life is perfect and that no person has it all together. We all struggle with something. Carry some burden. Worry about some issue out of our control.
What do you do when you don’t feel good enough because comparison is knocking at your door? Three things can be very helpful in those hidden moments:
• Get some perspective – Remind yourself that the person you are comparing yourself to is in a different stage of life. Take a cue from Jon Acuff: “Never compare your beginning to someone else’s middle.” You’re just in a different phase and that’s ok!
• Change your mindset – When an unwanted thought pops into your head, immediately smack that ugly down! Instead of listing what you don’t have and who you aren’t, start taking into account what you do appreciate about yourself. Remember: there is no one else like you in this world! Appreciate all the wonderful that is you.
• Celebrating the other person’s success – A great way to combat comparison is to honor others. Celebrate their wins and encourage them in their dreams. We are all sisters and if we don’t have each other’s backs, who will? Their win isn’t a loss for you; this world is big enough for us all to dream and be and succeed.
I share with you only what I’ve shared with myself in those moments. I know it’s not always easy to combat comparison but if you truly want to flourish in this life and walk out who you are in true confidence, embrace your contributions to this world and do it with a passion to see others do the same.
Brittany Rust is a writer, speaker, and pastor who has the privilege of serving on staff at Red Rocks Church in Denver, CO. She is also the host of the Epic Fails podcast, where she shares powerful stories of redemption in people’s lives. Brittany and her husband Ryan have a handsome son named Roman and together they make their home in the Rocky Mountains, pursuing outdoor adventures, great food, and memorable stories. You can find more inspiration for life at www.brittanyrust.com and catch her on Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter.